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Emotional Abuse in Marriage

Emotional abuse in marriage demonstrates a series of repeated incidents that insults, threatens, degrades, isolates, humiliates and controls a partner.

It cuts to the core of a person, attacking his/her very being.  Eventually, this can also leave a person feeling unworthy, undeserving, unloved, and insignificant.

Emotional abuse in marriage mostly occurs with women. Such acts leave a deep scar on a woman’s psyche, and the self-dignity of the victim is bruised repeatedly.

However, such abuse is difficult to identify though, as it can be very subtle, yet deeply affecting. This is even harder to prove as compared to sexual or physical abuse. How then, do we then recognize and deal with such abuse?

A few signs of emotional abuse in marriage include unrelenting criticism, intimidation, excessive yelling, manipulation, refusal to be pleased, negligence, and abandonment. The effect of emotional abuse is such that it warps personalities.

How can one identify whether a person is suffering from emotional abuse or not? The following are a few symptoms that point to emotional abuse in marriage:

  1. A person is afraid to state his/her opinion for fear of retaliation.
  2. A person is frightened to miss a phone call.
  3. He/she agrees to things just to avoid a fight.
  4. The person has to report where he/she is, who he/she is with, and what he/she is doing.
  5. The person never receives an apology, even when if he/she is right.
  6. The individual suffers from low self-esteem.

There are many forms of emotional abuse in marriage. A few key examples of how these forms may exist are as listed below:

  1. Devaluing the person.
  2. Giving no value to a person’s intelligence and opinion.
  3. Repeatedly questioning his/her intelligence.
  4. Public humiliation.
  5. Making someone feel inferior and laughing at him/her.
  6. Making a person feel unsafe by threatening him/her.
  7. Making it financially difficult for a partner to survive.

The consequences of emotional abuse in marriage are horrifying. Victims undergo intense suffering that interferes with their quality of life and their ability to be good parents, trust others, and even perform well at their workplaces. Some victims even attempt suicide, as they see such an act as a way out of repeated harassment.

So, how can any emotional abuse in marriage be controlled or eliminated altogether? 

The answers are simple. Identify the abuser, and recognize the fact that you first need to help yourself. This is an important first step towards healing:

  1. If you are emotionally abusive, a comprehensive evaluation by a clinical psychologist or another mental health professional should be arranged. This will help you understand the cause of your destructive behavior, and how you can stop it.
  2. If you are a victim of spousal abuse, don’t ever lapse into denial. Consult a therapist, keep going to counseling regularly, talk in an open and honest way, and be prepared to protect yourself.
  3. Other specific suggestions include simple things like practicing the correct way to respond to your partner’s behavior with help of your therapist. This also includes the simple act of insisting that the abuser should leave you alone. Or you can contact with Steve Moscovitch Therapy Winnipeg for solving this issues. He is really a good therapist ever.

Let the cycle of emotional abuse in marriage stop at the correct time before the situation goes out of hand. Follow the above steps to keep yourself happy and confident.

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